Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Slap him?

I was walking out of the grocery store when a small, blond boy, about yea tall, perhaps 6 or 7, with a shy, impish smile, tugged on my sleeve. He lisped,

"Lady, get me some chocolate?"

I smiled, irritatedly, because this ruddy, well-fed child wasn't exactly a beggar boy, said "no, sorry" and turned away. There was some muttering behind me, and I didn't get more than a few steps away when I was accosted in the rear.

That is to say, I was smacked in the butt.

I whirled quickly, exclaiming quite loudly, "Are you kidding me??!!"

It wasn't the 7-year old rogue, but his smaller, nearly identical brother, whose face was already smeared with something brown. Chocolate, I presumed/hoped. He laughed and pumped one fist in the air, clutching his other fist to his mouth. The nearest cashier, who had seen the whole exchange, gasped and giggled. I turned to the tall, blond, woman to whom the smaller blond boy had retreated.

"Is this your child?" I asked.

She nodded wordlessly, worriedly, having missed out on the scene.

"He just hit me in the butt!" I declared, equal parts angrily and bemusedly.

She made a shocked and horrified face, and immediately crouched down and began to say, "Oh no!" over and over again to her errant offspring, shaking him just the slightest bit. I added, "We don't do that to people!" waggling my finger in my most priggish manner, but was completely ignored. I gestured to the older boy, saying, "He asked me to buy him candy, and when I said no, this one (gesturing to the younger) hit me!" The mother never looked my way, but continued to gently berate her unrepentant, grinning spawn. I gleaned that he had already received many of these admonishments over his short life; none of which, judging from his pleased and sunny expression, had yet made any impact.

When it became apparent that no apology was forthcoming, I walked off, disgusted and annoyed, ending the encounter.

Except:

I wish I'd told that lady to teach those spoiled little monsters some manners and to keep their mitts to themselves before someone "accidentally" slaps them silly.

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