We should give them all our money

for the brilliant inventions that improve daily life:

• Fat separator: just throw your broth in and only the good stuff comes out! Which part is the good stuff is entirely up to you.
• Splatter guard: protects you from the ow! ahhh! ravages of frying pan cooking. Now you can cook bacon naked without fear!
• Microwave popcorn - What's an office without the maddening, tantalizing smell of popping corn? And burnt popping corn?
• And, my newest discovery - graham cracker pretzels! Everybody loves graham crackers, without loving their too-easily shattered structure. Why pretzel-shapes? Who cares - they are now dippable! (And therefore can be used as scoops for chocolate-caramel-cream cheese concoctions. Ummmmmmm.)